Frozen Hearts

             pc :Flavours Magazine

‘What must have gone wrong?  I married him because I thought he loved me. I feel so silly now, I should have known better,’ exclaimed Neha.

Neha is my longtime friend and is married for almost a decade. Her husband, Nitin is contemplating separation from her citing ‘fell out of love’. 

Marriages fall apart due to various reasons. Such as personality mismatch, falling out of love, financial issues, abusive behavior, intimacy, substance abuse, interference by in-laws and few more. 

1. Personality Mismatch – Sometimes, clashes take place in couples as their personalities do not match. 

2. Falling out of love – It may have begun with ‘love at first sight’, however over the years and after staying together one partner may not have the same feelings for the other. 

3. Financial issues – The stress involved due to financial insecurity can lead to the marriage falling apart. 

4. Abusive behavior – If a person doesn’t have bruises doesn’t mean they aren’t suffering from abusive behavior. A person can be abused mentally, emotionally, physically, sexually, financially and even verbally. 

5. Intimacy – Some of the factors stated above could lead to tension in intimacy between the couple. Physical incompatibility could be a primary reason for the couple to drift apart. 

6. Addiction – Addiction is also of many types. To name a few such as alcohol, gambling, stealing, drugs and smoking. If these aren’t addressed timely, then it’s a grave threat to any marriage. 

7. Interference by in-laws – Unnecessary meddling in the couple’s family life by in-laws causes arguments and rifts between their relationship. 

8. Lack of communication – is an essential element of any relationship. A lack of communication breeds distrust, self-doubt and insecurity which can be damaging to your bond. 

Love is the fuel that keeps the ship sailing but in the absence of love, hearts get frozen and two people eventually drift apart. Some couples have a good time together, parenting the kids and sharing their duties – but they may have fallen out of love. Due to the burden of responsibilities and challenges of life, they grow apart over the years. 

For any relationship to blossom, an equal number of sacrifices and adjustments need to be made. A balance needs to be arrived at. When you get two people to do that than a satisfying, fulfilling and lasting marriage can be expected. 

@Swati M